My name is Archie Downes and I am a massively talented and impressive Jack Russell terrier, and I Live at the Centre for Fortean Zoology, the English speaking world’s largest (and according to Dad, the best) cryptozoological research organisation. I have a weekly webTV show on YouTube. Well it’s not all about me, but it should be. You can see it here: https://m.youtube.com/user/cfztv As I’m sure you are aware by now, I am by far the most important person at the CFZ. But the tragedy is Dad spends all his income on Gin, and hardly buys me any of the many treats a dog of my status deserves. So here is your chance to rectify this. For the price of a cup of coffee I can finance my burgeoning film career, plot world domination, and pay for the damage that I caused when I dug a hole in the sitting room carpet.