Mid June I had my first existential anxiety related panic attack in months.
I found out that the covid relief funds I have gotten had a change of rule after I asked for them and they disallow me to use them to pay my personal expenses over a tiny limit and I don't think I'll have the mental spoons to deal with fighting this legally.
This made me the first time of really worry about my existence and I appreciate any little help <3
I'm suffering from a chronic fatiguing condition for a while now and am not getting out much anymore to hunt for new gigs. Please shout out if you need a remote developer who's very capable in web development (mainly ruby, js) and is currently learning Rust.
My longer-term goal is to put my brain fully into developing and fixing open-source software and not having to rely on non-open source work to survive.
I'm starting to reach out to people because my medical condition makes it hard for me to find new (and good!) jobs and for the sake of my mental health, I don't want to end up having to fall back on social security system here ever again (but also burn myself out trying to survive!).